Tuesday, December 31, 2013


I am now about three days overdue.

I was due Friday the 27th.  

I saw my midwife today.  I was really looking forward to it! I was confident that Baby Boy was head down and engaged and just biding his time.  We just came for a very quick appointment.


Despite the fact that Baby Boy was head down at my last appointment, and head down on Friday, his head is now up by my left rib cage.  Basically, he is laying across my tummy with nothing down in the birth canal.  

This is not what I wanted to hear!

My midwife recommended going to the hospital immediately and having him turned and then induced.

This is also not what I wanted to hear.

I was surprised at how concerned she was.  I was surprised that she was so quick to recommend the hospital and the doctor and all of that.  She usually is not like that.

She was not optimistic that he could turn head down again.


After prayer and thought, Dave and I have decided that we will do everything we can to make him turn naturally before we give in to going to the hospital.  We believe in the power of prayer and we believe that God knows our desire, which is to have a home birth with our midwife and to not have to have to go to the hospital.

So we have decided that I will continue to go to the chiropractor.  I will do those things that I was told to do to keep him head down, like getting on all fours on the floor and basically kissing the floor with my bum up in the air. I'm going to be doing this several times a day.  I will be laying on my right side several times a day and playing music for him.  I will be slathering peppermint oil on my tummy.  

I'll be praying like mad and just concentrating on Baby Boy turning.

You see, if I didn't know that he has been head down a lot during this pregnancy, then I would be concerned too.  If I hadn't heard my midwife say that he looks great and there is a lot of amniotic fluid around him, I'd be very concerned.  If I hadn't felt him somersaulting and moving so much and if I hadn't seen him head down so much, I'd just go right to the hospital and have done with it all.  If I hadn't just read a ton of articles online about babies being transverse even this late in pregnancy and turning, then I'd keep worrying like crazy

But we really want to give the Lord a chance to perform a miracle for us.  We firmly believe that He can, because He has already!!

Now, what I need dearly from you is your prayers! 

Please pray that Baby Boy will turn head down.  Please pray that his head will engage in the birth canal.  Please pray that it will stay there and that he will not turn around again.  

We promised that we would try everything we could and if Friday rolls around and he is still transverse, we will go in to the hospital.

Even typing that sentence gives me the creeps and there is no peace there for me.

So, my prayer warriors....

READY, SET, PRAY!!!!!!!!!

Sunday, December 29, 2013

Checking In

I'm checking in again!

Nope, no baby yet.

Sorry to disappoint you.

I'm trying to keep my mind occupied as I await the end of this seemingly endless pregnancy!!! 

Thanks for your super, super kind comments and all of your prayers for me.

Maybe the next time I check in it will be to introduce Baby Boy!

Stay tuned....

Thursday, December 26, 2013

Still Cooking

I thought that I'd better not leave you hanging anymore!

No, Baby Boy has not been born.

He's quite happy in his warm little home.

I saw my midwife Tuesday.  She felt around my tummy carefully and intensely and we were all disappointed to note that his head was probably up under my left rib cage again!


She decided to do a quick ultrasound, and she put the wand on my left rib cage....no head!

Baby Boy is head down.  She decided to do a quick and very gentle pelvic exam and I wasn't dilated at all, but my cervix is very soft.....and she could feel his head, although it wasn't engaged.

He hasn't got a lot of dropping to do.  

I'm due tomorrow, as everyone knows.

Since my last two babies have been born in the bathroom, tonight I put a little chair in there, right across from the toilet, with a warm blankie and some things to wipe him off when he comes out.  I also put his first hat and a warm pair of socks on the chair.  I felt the need to put that stuff in there, to be ready.

I don't think he'll be here tomorrow...

But stay tuned!

Saturday, December 21, 2013

6 Days

Well, I guess this pregnancy is down to just the single numbers in terms of how long I have left.

In the beginning of this pregnancy, we thought for sure I was going to lose this baby too.

You see, from the time I found out I was pregnant again, back in late March, I was bleeding.  I knew what that meant.  Since I have a very, very hard time sustaining a pregnancy, I knew already not to get attached.  I knew to protect my heart.  I look back in my Bible and I see all of the passages of Scripture that I highlighted and marked and they all say "your promise will be fulfilled"…."Joy comes in the morning"…."Your valley of tears will turn into joy soon"……

It was hard to believe those things when cramps and blood stare you in the face.

Against all odds, this little life took root.  Strong root.  This baby was determined.

And against my "logical mind", I started to get attached.

There were a ton of tears in those early days.  There was a lot of fear.  Stress was rampant and emotions were out of control.  I was sure this baby would be the next one to be waiting for me in Heaven.

But here we are.

6 days until my due date.  

This miracle baby will not be denied.  He lives.  He kicks and squirms in my womb.  Sometimes his kicks take my breath away with their strength.  

He will not be denied.

Friends ask how I'm feeling right now.  Do they want to know the truth? Do they ask about my emotional health? 

My emotional health is the kicker right now.

Yes, I'm very large.  Yes, I'm feeling extremely pregnant.  Yes, I think I'm going to make it until my due date, and maybe beyond.  No, I have not been having lots of contractions.  Yes, the baby is very, very low. If he got any lower he'd be out.  That's fine that people want to know all about those things.

But my emotional health?

For me, right now, it's like trying to walk quickly over an iced over pond.  There are patches where I find it easy to just walk right over.  There are also patched which are holding me up.  They're the patches of ice on my journey that are thin and precarious and I'm begging God to help me get over them without falling in to the deep, frigid waters underneath the ice.

To me, the ice is thin right now.  It's fear.  It's anxiety.  It's irrational terror.  

Is this labor going to be like my other labors? Am I strong enough to do this again? Will I be able to love this baby? Will I get through this labor with strength and dignity? Will it hurt so much that I'll give in to the fear? Will he be alright? Will his birth be just as easy as all of my others? Where's the joy and excitement of meeting a new little son? How come I'm so freaked out?

These are the questions that I'm struggling with right now.

But it all comes down to one thing:

Do I trust my Lord, no matter what?

This conundrum has been plaguing, yes plaguing me, for weeks now.  I've been doing a LOT of praying! 

I WANT to trust my Lord.  He makes promises in His word.  He promises to give strength to the weary.  He promises to be a shelter to those who put their trust in Him.  He promises to protect and keep safe and carry me.

And that is my heart's cry! 

I know those of you who read my blog are praying for me.  I appreciate it! PLEASE don't stop.  I want this birth to be joyful and peaceful.  I want to be confident and have strength.  I want a miracle birth to match the miracle my son is.

Please Lord, help me to trust in You.  Lord, help me to know that I CAN trust in You.

Wednesday, December 11, 2013

Another Random Update

Well, it's been a bit too long since I've posted!

I can't have my friends out there thinking anything's wrong.

Okay, today I went to the doctor and my midwife and I'm officially 37 weeks and 5 days.  Baby Boy is looking off-the-charts awesome and I'm actually feeling better than I have this whole entire pregnancy! My friends who've had more than one baby are telling me this is the "calm" before labor and delivery! My midwife said so too.

I'm really thankful for my midwife, who has been delivering babies for over 30 years.  She never fails to listen to me and really hear me and she encourages me to listen to my heart and my intuitions. She says both are from the Lord and I ought to take them seriously.  When the doctor gives me the clinical, doom-and-gloom scenario, she always tells me different.  She told me today that God knows my body and that He created me to give birth.  It's always very encouraging to see my midwife!

We were able to get Baby Boy's crib.  I'm so happy and relieved.  I really didn't think we'd be able to get it anytime soon, or even later.....now we have to get his bedding.  I'm having it custom made by a sweet, sweet gal on Etsy, which is what I did for Sofia and Lucie.  The crib has been set up in our room for about two weeks and it still amazes me that there is actually going to be a baby sleeping in it very soon! And a Baby Boy! It's a really beautiful crib and I feel so, so incredibly blessed to have it.

I've been seeing my chiropractor regularly, as I did with my pregnancies with Lucie and Pennie.  I may have seen her also with Sofia, but I can't remember.  My chiropractor is specially trained in pregnancy adjustment and easing discomfort, and she is also trained in getting breech babies to turn head down.  She has a very, very high success rate there.  I absolutely cannot go through a pregnancy without seeing her regularly.  My pregnancies with Lucie and Pennie were physically the best ones I've had, and my labors and deliveries with them were the best too.  I know it's because of chiropractic care! I missed my appointment last month and I'm feeling it! I'm scheduled to go in this evening.....

On another bit of a rabbit trail, all of my older girls went with Daddy to get our Christmas tree! Hopefully they'll be back before my chiropractic appointment.  I really, really need an adjustment! Since we only have one car and I can't drive right now, I depend on my guys to take me places.  But if I don't make it to my appointment this evening, I have a back up appointment scheduled for Friday morning.

It's been really, really cold here lately.  The temperature around here has been down in the teens regularly, and we've had our fireplace going a lot! It's unusual weather for us.  Our winters usually are very wet around here.  Today marks the first day that it hasn't been icy and frosty.  It's 34 right now, and it's supposed to be back to regular rainy weather by tomorrow.  Since I'm super hot right now due to my Little Heater in my belly, I'm loving the cold weather.  It also makes it really seem Christmasy!

I have only gained one pound in the last few months.  Whew.  I've been craving iced tea a lot lately.  I'm going to make a big jug of it and put it in the fridge so I can be sipping on it.  Craving iced tea is unusual for me!  I'm still trying to drink a ton of water, and I'm actually not being very good to remember it.  Ugh.  I need to fill my water jug up right now!

Right now I'm sleeping better than I have throughout the whole pregnancy.  Sure, I use 4 pillows and sleep as upright as I can....but sleep is a valuable, precious commodity to me and I'm so grateful to be sleeping well at night.  I also sleep a lot during the first part of the day.  It's my body conserving energy for Baby Boy's Birth Day!

Anyway, I think that's all I had on my mind. And yes, I will let everyone know when Baby Boy arrives! Please pray for me, that I will have an uncomplicated, peaceful delivery and that I will be joyful and peaceful throughout labor and delivery.  Thank you!!

Monday, December 2, 2013

The Stable

"Let The Stable Still Astonish"

Let the stable still astonish~~
Straw, dirt floor, dull eyes.
Dusty flanks of donkeys, oxen,
Crumbling, crooked walls.
No bed to carry that pain,
and then, the Child,
rag-wrapped, laid to cry
in a trough.

Who would have chosen this?
Who would have said "Yes!
Let the God of all the heavens
and earth
be born here, in this place"?

Who but the same God
Who still stands 
in the darker, fouler rooms
of our hearts
and says 
"Yes! Let the God of heaven
and earth
be born here
in THIS place."

Leslie Leyland Fields

Sunday, November 24, 2013

More Thankfulness

I remembered that I wanted to do this 30 Days of Thanksgiving thing, and I remembered that in my last post of what I was thankful for, there were only 11 things, so in order to catch up, I need to add some more things!!

So, I will!

12: I am SO thankful for this girl, for many reasons.  Her life in the womb was fought for and Christ won a major victory over the enemy, in that after Olivia died, the doctors told me that Pennie had a 35% chance of also dying.  But she is here with us and she is seriously the joy in our days! She just makes us so happy and she truly is a miracle.  I could make a whole list of why I'm thankful for her, but let's just leave it at that!!

13: I'm VERY thankful to be nearing the end of this pregnancy.  I just can't wait to see Baby Boy's face and to hold the reward in my arms!

14: I'm thankful that we've had a lot of extremely cold and frosty mornings lately.  I love to sit in the chair and look at the sun rising and see the magical world of frost and sparkle.  Right now it's 27 degrees, which is probably summer weather to some of you reading this, but to us, it's pretty cold! I love the winter-like landscape and I do hope it snows a bit this winter!

15:  Along those same lines, it does rain a LOT here in our region, and lately it hasn't rained hardly at all, so I'm thankful for that…but lately I find myself also being thankful for the rain because then we can be all cozy inside our humble home and life just kind of slows down when it rains.  December looks like it's one big rain shower this year…..but it'll be cozy in here.

16:  I'm thankful that I'm not a picky eater at all.  I have never been picky, even from a very young age.  Not being picky means there's such a variety of things I can eat and love and I really love that.  I feel so sorry for my picky children.  Life is so tough when food doesn't appeal to you!! But I love lots of stuff, especially a loaded salad!

(And though it's not a part of my thankful list, here's a list of things I don't like: hominy, sweet potatoes, rhubarb, corn, squid, octopus, and mussels!)

17: I'm thankful that my husband doesn't care that I get up so early each morning.  I'm thankful that he sleeps so well that I don't wake him up when I get up.  In the late Fall and early Winter, I get up when it's still dark and I love it because then I can watch the sun rise.  I'm thankful God made early mornings!

18:  I'm thankful that we know people who raise healthy, grass-fed cows and that my husband has a steady job so that we can fill our freezer every Fall with beef of all cuts that is healthy for us.

19:  I'm thankful to whoever created guacamole.  I simply adore the stuff.  I grew up in Southern California, where avocados were plentiful and always available, and I have loved them from a very early age.  I have loved guacamole from a very young age too.  I think I feel a craving coming on…..

20: In conjunction with that, I'm thankful that I have a daughter who shares my love of guacamole and coincidentally, makes the best guacamole ever.

21:  I'm very thankful that my health is holding up well through the latter half of this pregnancy.  

22: This might be on a materialistic note, but I'm so thankful for gift cards.  We have gotten some gift cards from our friends and we'll be able to get that new crib that we need for Baby Boy! Now it's just finding the time to go get it!!

23:  I'm thankful that some of my girls still like to go places with me.  When I'm with my girls, it's like being with sisters that I never had.  

24:  I'm thankful that our family will be able to spend Thanksgiving with my father-in-law and his wife.  All I have to do is bring something for Lucie, who has food allergies, and that's it.  We're all looking forward to spending time over there!!

Well, there you have it.  I'm caught up now…..And I'll write out some more things that I'm thankful for next week.  

Thanks so much for your faithful friendship and thank for wanting to read my blog!!

Friday, November 22, 2013


This is going to be a bit of a random post!

I feel really random right now….

First I want to start with responding to your comments on my Bumpdate post.  Our computer gives me such trouble whenever I try to respond to you directly that it's just sometimes not worth it.  So, I'll respond here!!

First off, Tesha has been one of the most faithful bloggy friends to me!! I don't even remember when I started reading her blog, but we share a common bond, in that we are both BabyLoss Mamas.  She is almost always the first to comment on my posts, and her comments are always so sweet and encouraging, and a lot of the time she's the only commenter! Tesha, if you're reading this, I deeply appreciate you.  DEEPLY! You've been such a cheerleader for me and I just hope I can return your sweetness and encouragement a tiny bit to you! I love emailing back and forth with you…someday we'll get to meet in real life!

Also, Erin is one of my dear bloggy friends too.  I mean, on this blogging journey you "meet" so many people! Some are passing friends. Others, like Erin, are pretty true and pretty faithful.  Erin lives in Oklahoma and she is my other faithful commenter.  She always leaves a comment that makes me smile and you know, her blog is one of my top 5 favorites!! Erin, I'm so happy to know you just a teenie bit.  I'm so happy you read my blog and I just simply adore your wonderful comments!

Then there's my bloggy friend over at A Bite of Country Cupcakes. I don't know her name and I don't think she's posting anymore on her blog.  I think she lives in Australia….how cool is that??!! Like I said, you meet bloggy friends from all over when you blog.  She has always been encouraging to me and I do so wish that she'd post on her blog so that we could all get to know her better! So, Cupcake, if you're reading this, I simply love your great comments that let me know that indeed, i'm not alone!!

To Susan, I wanted to say that it's okay if you tell me how much your last baby weighed!! It doesn't scare me! Most of my babies have been in the very low 8 lb range, with the exception of Kellie, who weighed 8 lbs 12.5 ounces and was almost 23 inches long! We called her our Hunk of Burnin' Love!! She was deliciously chubby but you wouldn't know it by looking at her now, as an almost 11 year old.  And Russell, since he was 5 weeks early, he weighed under 6 lbs…and Pennie, at two weeks early, weighed 5 lbs 13 ounces. But what I want to say is that Kellie was just as easy to deliver as any of the others.  Susan, the fact that you hinted that your last baby was huge and you were as big as me doesn't really bother me.  I know that I can look back on my labor and delivery history and see that every single one of my labors and deliveries have been almost exactly the same.  I don't really think this Baby Boy is going to be an enormous baby.

What I really love and really need right now are your prayers.  

I need to know you're out there praying for me across the US or elsewhere.

So, aside from addressing the comments on my last post, my sleep has been pretty touch and go lately.  But, as any seasoned Mama out there knows, this is just par for the course, isn't it?? Wednesday during the night I got up three times to go to the bathroom and also, I had a hideous, excruciating pain in my left hip…I wondered if you could experience labor pain on only one side of your body?? Because I thought for sure it was labor! Anyway, I got up yesterday morning at 4:45 AM! Boy, was I tired the rest of the day! But this morning I managed to get a full almost 5 hours of sleep….and I didn't have to get up 3 times to go potty….I only had to get up once at 12:30 AM!!! So I woke up after 5 this morning! YAY!! The thing is, I will probably wake up earlier and earlier the closer it gets to labor and delivery time. I just get really restless as my body is preparing more and more to have this baby.  Anyone else every experience that??

I managed to sneak in a haircut yesterday!!!!! I know, I can't believe it myself.  I hadn't had a haircut in literally at least 8 months.  Believe me, my hair needed the cut!! I had been toying around with going without bangs and hadn't had bangs for a long time, but I was kind of sick of my really, really long bangs falling in my face, so I had my Hair Girl cut a bit of bangs! Sadly, I don't have before and after pics because I don't have a Smart Phone (or any phone for that matter) and don't know how to operate the camera very well anyway…..Maybe I'll get one of my girls to take a pic and post it later on!!  I like my haircut.  I always really like how my Hair Girl does my hair.

What's more, I got to take a shower on Wednesday!!!! If you're a Mama of more than one baby, you can rejoice with me on this one!!

Now, this post is getting really long and it's pretty boring without pictures, so I'll end it….

But I really appreciate your comments and your friendship and your prayers for me…..

34 DAYS TO GO!!!!

Friday, November 15, 2013


I can't believe that today marks 8.5 months pregnant for me!!!

So, today I'll do a new, 34 week Bumpdate.

Yes, I really AM that big! Please, no rude or mean comments! I've already had my fair share for this pregnancy.

Neither my doctor nor my midwife are ever worried about how "big" I am, so I guess I'm not worried either....although it is almost impossible for me to walk and stand and even lay down comfortably.

Okay, here's the Bumpdate:

How far along: 34 weeks/8.5 months today!

Weight Gained? Yep, I've gained weight!! My ankles and legs still haven't been swollen.  They haven't been swollen since I got out of the hospital, which is really good; this helps me to know that my blood sugar and my blood pressure is right on track.  

Size of Baby: Hmm, I think Baby is about the size of a large pineapple.  Weight estimates are about 4 lbs or so.

Gender: Still a boy!

Cravings:  I've been craving hot ham and cheese sandwiches and iced tea....craving the sandwiches is really strange for me, because I usually prefer turkey! But hot ham and cheese sounds sooo good to me! I haven't eaten one yet, but I've had a couple of iced teas lately, without sugar.

Looking Forward To:  The first time I get to see his face....his first breath....kissing his wet, gooey, soft head....looking into his eyes....seeing my husband's face as he looks for the first time at his second son! I'm also, on a more material note, looking forward to my baby shower tomorrow.  I can't wait to share it with my girls!

What I Miss: absolutely nothing!!

Sleep: I'm tired all of the time.  I go to bed at 10 PM or so.  Most nights I doze a bit before 10 in the recliner.  I have to get up twice during the night to go potty.  I've been getting up to start my day before 6 AM, and I know as labor and delivery get closer for me, I'll get up earlier and earlier, since I get really restless the closer I get to delivery!  I sleep pretty well, when I do, but I have to sleep sitting up, which is the only comfortable position for me! 

Interestingly, right before I go to bed Baby Boy thinks it's time to rock and roll in my tummy, so he starts somersaulting and kicking really hard as soon as I want to get into bed! He's been doing this every single night for about a month.  He always settles down after I've been in bed for about an hour.  He usually wakes up at 5 or so with a kick or two, and then when I wake up for the day I usually go to my husband's desk in the hallway and read my devotion online, and I'll drink my morning vitamin/mineral stuff and he'll really get moving then.  He's on a pretty regular schedule and I know that he'll be on his own schedule when he gets here!

After Baby Boy gets here, I plan on going to bed early and, since my husband is a night owl, I'll give Baby Boy to him to hold on his chest until Baby Boy gets hungry and then I'll feed him and he'll settle down for sleep then.  My husband comes to bed a few hours after I do so this will work out.....but you know, plans do change!!!

I still can't wrap my mind around the fact that I'm going to have a son in a few weeks.  I feel like I've been a Girl Mama for so long that having a boy again after so many years is so foreign to me! Still, I can't wait to hold him for the very first time!!

Tuesday, November 12, 2013


This morning I was fooling around on our family FB page and I came across a super, super amazing site!

It's called WiseDecor and they make and sell wall decals.  You can get scripture, monograms, wise sayings, and anything your heart desires for your walls in your home.

I simply LOVE words on my walls but I just haven't been able to get the supplies to be able to paint any on my walls.  I'm a doodler and I adore doodling fancy words and fonts and pictures.

If you love words on your walls, then this is the site for you.  They have a "Scripture" category which has so many wonderful declarations for your home.

I'm not being paid or compensated in any way, shape or form for doing this post, but I just love wall words and I thought they did such a good job!

So, here's the link:


Please, go to their site and check out everything they have!!

Monday, November 11, 2013


I have decided to jump on the "31 Days of Thankfulness" bandwagon and so, I've been posting sporadically what I'm thankful for on FB…..

But I want to do 31 Things I'm Thankful For as a post on my blog.

Here I go!

1.  I'm thankful for breath.  I'm thankful for another day to start over again.

2.  I'm thankful for really, really good coffee.

3.  I'm thankful that I'm going gray very, very gradually and I'm thankful for being able to ease into the process instead of waking up one day completely gray! My hair is very, very dark. It's a brown that looks almost black and so gray strands are very, very stark and noticeable, and mine are actually not gray but silver….but they're hidden and very few! I haven't decided if I'll dye my hair, but I don't think I will.

4.  I'm thankful to live every single day with my very best friends, my daughters.

5.  On that note, I have no idea what the Lord is thinking by giving me so many children, but His plan is so much more wise and perfect than mine and I'm SO thankful that He does have a plan!

6.  I'm thankful for eyes that see so that I can witness the gorgeous, super-saturated colors of Autumn here in my town.  It is truly a feast for the eyes!

7.  I'm thankful for tastebuds that still work.  I am a closet Foodie, so taste is super important to me.

8.  I'm so thankful for my new water jug.  You can go to www.lifefactory.com to see my water jug.  They come in different sizes and different colors.  Mine is the large aqua one.  I've been sternly admonished that I really need to be drinking more water and so I needed a water jug and this one is wonderful! I try to drink at least two of them a day.

9.  I'm thankful for our car.  Though it may be beat up and very small and though we may have to take two trips to church in order to get everyone there, we still have a car and I'm so thankful.

10.  I'm thankful beyond measure that I can be a stay at home mama and that my husband has a good job.  I know that there isn't a lot of security in the world today, but my husband's job has been there through it all for 20 years now.  We know that the Lord continues to provide for us through my husband's job and I am very, very thankful.

11.  I'm thankful that the Lord gave me the recipe for making my very own gluten free/wheat free flour mixture.  I'm thankful because I and some of my children have food allergies and it sure helps that I can make things like cupcakes and muffins and breads and cakes and biscuits for all of us, that we can all have…..

And that's all I'm going to say for now, since I'm caught up!!

I'm trying to think of all of the seemingly small, inconsequential things that I'm thankful for, instead of the obvious things that grace everyone's lists these days.  Yes, being thankful for sight and breath and taste may seem obvious, but as close as I came to death a few months ago, I never want to lose sight of the fact that God literally snatched me away from the jaws of the enemy just in time.  And now I'm whole and healthy and what's more, so is the baby within my womb.  So, two lives were saved and I recognize that we are both miracles.  I never, ever want to forget that, so you'll hear me marveling about those things a lot.  I usually marvel quietly and am amazed silently, but I'm going to be saying it out loud a lot more!!

I think I'm going to put up a "Thankful List" on the front door so that my children can write things down.  I want to make it a long piece of paper with lots of space for them to really be creative.

Okay, maybe I will do one last thing that I'm thankful for:  I've got 45 days left of this pregnancy, and I am more than thankful, I'm humbled and in awe and grateful and totally brought low to be the vessel to carry this life.  I've gotten this far and well……

It's a miracle!

Thursday, October 31, 2013


Well, thanks for all of your comments on my last post!

**Warning: birth stories ahead.  LONG post ahead! You may want to turn back now!!**

4 Comments! I was so excited.  I felt really popular! 

Thanks for not hating me for my ridiculous labors and deliveries.

In this post,  I decided to answer any question you might have about my labors/deliveries.

How fun!

To start with, I had the same OB/GYN for 19 years.  His office was located just minutes from our house, and for many years he was the most wonderful doctor.

I've had 7 of my children at our local hospital that happens to be just three blocks and across the lake from our house.

When I went into labor with Russell, our first baby, I was 5 weeks early and when I called the doctor's office that morning at around 4:15 after I thought that my water had GUSHED and not merely broken, they told me I had probably just wet the bed and to come in the next day, which was a Monday, for a test that would determine whether I had a bladder/kidney infection or not.  I was pretty sure I had NOT wet the bed.  We decided I'd better go to the hospital.  Once we got there, the nurse on duty checked to see if it was really my water that had broken....yes, yes it was.....then she decided to check me to see if I was dilated......yes, yes I was, to 8.5 centimeters....the doctor wasn't there and when her fingers came away covered with blood, she decided to call him.  I heard her on the other side of the curtain talking to him, snatches of her conversation with words like "8.5", "almost complete", "head right there".....I knew it was serious.  The doctor got there in enough time, basically 20 minutes before he was born at 5:52 AM, an hour after I had gotten to the hospital.  Basically he sat down on his stool and caught our son!

With Samantha (baby #3) and Sofia (baby # 7), I had both of them in the hospital without the doctor present at all.  Samantha delivered herself under the blankets.  Sofia also delivered herself, and the cord was wrapped three times very, very tightly around her neck, so the team of three nurses who delivered her just cut it wherever they could find a spot and blood spurted everywhere, even on the nurses.  She was fine.  I was fine.

By this time in my childbirth scenario, I had been doing lots and lots of research. I noticed things happening at our local hospital that I didn't like.  I wanted to know such things as why they put the ointment in the baby's eyes and why they needed these shots right after their birth.....I wanted to know why the doctors dressed like aliens in preparation for the births......and we started to be looked on as weirdos because we were asking so many questions.

When I was pregnant with Lucie, Dave let it slip at one of our appointments that we had been looking into having her at home....and I became Persona Non Grata overnight.  I went from being one of my doctors favorite patients to a total scum.

He kept that attitude and when I was pregnant with Pennie, he decided, after a few ultrasounds that showed that "there really was only one baby in there" I needed higher risk care due to my past history, so he shared my care with a doctor down the road a bit.   When we found out we were having twins, and then Dave let it slip again that we would probably have them at home simply because I had a hard time making it to the hospital, that sealed his dislike of us and he dropped me like a hot potato.

So, I have had most of my babies at the hospital and have had three babies (Olivia included) at home.

No, I have never had an epidural.  Never.  I delivered Russell without any drugs just because it was so fast.  I had a shot of Demerol with Hannah and, after feeling totally in my right mind, in the middle of a conversation with the doctor and my husband, I began talking about the giraffes I saw in the room, no more Demerol for Mama! I do not remember having any drugs with any of my other babies.  

I did take pain killers afterwards, because as any mom of more than two babies knows, those nursing afterpains are worse than labor!!

Yes, I have cussed as I was pushing several of my babies out.  Those of you who do labor/delivery without drugs sympathize! I have a favorite word, and no, it is not the F Bomb.

I have told my husband on more than one occasion, as he faithfully stood at my side holding my hand, that I couldn't do it and wanted to go home.

After Russell was born, Dave had these bleeding, deep half moon marks on his hand.  I asked him what they were and he told me that I had clawed his hand badly when I was in labor.  Yikes.  When I was in labor with Hannah, he was actually cutting my fingernails!!

My husband never, ever leaves me during labor and delivery.  He divides his time between holding my hand and going down to the foot of the bed to check on Baby's progress. He always laughs joyfully and cries a bit after every single one of our babies comes out.

My husband delivered Lucie and Pennie.  He delivered Pennie with the help of a dear friend who came for the birth, and who was also 7 months pregnant herself at the time.

I almost bled to death after Samantha was born, due to the fact that the placenta refused to detach.  After she was born, I couldn't even sit up or talk without feeling like I was going to pass out.  Doctor did not order a blood transfusion, but at my 6 week check up, he admitted that he should have ordered blood for me.  I was so pale after she was born that I looked dead.  I couldn't hear because my ears were ringing so loudly.  Turning my head caused me to almost throw up.  I had a very bad tear with her also.  It was not very fun healing after she was born, but I did, without a blood transfusion at all.

In answer to any questions that you may have about whether I prefer hospital births over home births, the answer is: I will never, ever give birth in our local hospital ever again, barring any emergencies.  When I was told, at an appointment when I was pregnant with The Twins, that my local hospital would not let me leave without a social worker going over my file and telling me if I could leave or not, that sealed the deal for me.  Home births for me all the way.

That said, I am not stupid or foolish.  If there was any slight problem, I am glad the hospital is there.

I found out that the ointment the nurses put in the newborn's eyes is to kill any sexually transmitted bacteria.  Couples who are in charge of their birth plan and have been monogamous for many, many years ought to be able to opt out of having this stuff put into their babies eyes.  Sheesh, any parents in their right minds ought to be able to opt out!

If fact, you should be able to opt out of anything you want to before and after your baby is born.  Even the PKU heel stick.  Believe me, you do get treated differently if you opt out of anything after your baby is born.

So, I plan on having Baby Boy at home.  I have a midwife who has been delivering babies for over 30 years and is highly respected in our community and the county and beyond.  I also am under the care of a very, very good perinatologist who is okay with having the midwife scenario should everything in this pregnancy continue to go normally.  I really, really like both my midwife and my perinatologist.

These days there's talk about writing up Birth Plans......let me tell you, you can do that for your own peace of mind and as something to keep you occupied during your pregnancy, but once you get to the hospital, it goes out the window, at least in most hospitals it does.  A good hospital and good doctors and nurses will follow your plan to the letter.

I'm looking forward to having Baby Boy at home!!!!!

Thursday, October 24, 2013


63 Days!!!

That sure doesn't seem like a very long time to me......

And I feel that it's going faster and faster each day.  Isn't that the way of pregnancy though? At first it seems to go so slowly.....but then, as the pregnancy progresses and Baby gets bigger, the days seem to pick up a bit of speed, until the third trimester, and then everything just spirals out of control!

I was talking to my perinatologist and giving him an analogy on how fast the last trimester is going for me and he said.....

"Yep, you can't put the brakes on this one!"

It's sobering.

You know, I don't know about you, if you've experienced pregnancy or childbirth, but for those of you reading this post who have, I wonder if, as soon as you get pregnant, you begin to fear labor and delivery.  Is this just me? Or is this a universal fear? I'd be interested to know because way back in March, as soon as that little test stick came up with two pink lines, labor and delivery were the first things that obsessed my mind.  I'd find myself thinking about it during the day.  I'd have sudden rushes of sweaty, gripping terror! I'd go to bed thinking about it. In the second trimester these feelings abated a bit.....but.....

Now, with about 63 days, or 9 weeks, until Baby Boy makes his debut, I find myself praying daily, sometimes every few minutes, for courage and bravery.  I pray to be able to just get through.  I pray for strength for my body.

Something you ought to know about me is that my labors and deliveries are not like the numerous and countless birth stories I've read.  I hesitate to say it, but my labors and deliveries are ridiculously easy.  My body was made for having babies.  That doesn't mean there's no pain and,after two hours, dressed in my best dress and pearls, I sashay out to front porch and, lo and behold, there's a baby in a basket, all cozily wrapped in a warm and charming blanket.  No, not quite.  But my labors and deliveries don't last long and are not excruciatingly painful.  I don't talk a lot about it because I don't want to be hated in the Mama Community.....but it's a fact.


That irrational fear comes upon me.  Every. SINGLE. TIME.


With 9 weeks left, I'm praying that I'll be brave.  I'm praying that I can labor and deliver with peace.  I guess that's the biggest thing I'm asking for.  I want to be blanketed, infused, surrounded with the Lord's peace.  

My husband always marvels at my fear in this area.  He's been with me through every single delivery of every single child we've had, and even delivered two of our girls himself, and he always marvels at how easy and quick it is for me.  


If you are familiar with this silly labor/delivery fear, please pray for me.  And for Baby Boy.  My babies usually deliver themselves.  Just pray. I want Christ to conquer this fear in me and I want Him to shine, even through labor and delivery,  through how ever much  pain and intensity there will be this time.


Thursday, October 17, 2013


Yes, I told you I was going to do a late Bumpdate, didn't I?

Well, I was waiting to take a picture of my Bump...which is really not a cute little Bump anymore.....it's a Mountain that causes people to look at me with a horrified look or a look of sympathy and ask, in the most hushed tone, "are you due next week?"


How about this one: "are you sure there's only one in there?"

I read a post today about strangers losing their filters, meaning that those around us have no propriety or manners anymore and will say whatever comes to their minds when they see families like ours......

How about the lady I'm acquainted with that I saw recently at a sale? She looked at me with total disgust and asked me how many kids I had now, and I told her that this baby would make 9 kids for us, and she looked at me and spat:  "Well, you're not very smart! But...your kids are nice so...." I looked at her, and with a perfectly straight face said: "They certainly don't get that from me, obviously!" and I walked away.

It's getting to where I just don't want to go anywhere anymore just because of the comments and the stares, especially because I have to use those little motorized scooters to get around anywhere, as per my doctor's orders.  

Let me just be honest here, it's very, VERY hard to listen to the comments and still remember that I'm a Christian and that I must let the law of love be on my tongue.  The comments are always made to me when my husband isn't with me.  It's almost like his very presence deflects any rude people from opening their mouth. 

I wish he could be with me all the time!

I also wonder how my children feel when those comments are thrown at me.  

Anyway, I sure didn't mean to go on that rant!

But, even without a picture, I'll update you on our progress anyway!

How far along? We are officially 30 weeks now.  That's 7 and a half months!!!

Size of baby? He's in the 64 percentile.

Gender? It's a boy!

Weight gained? I haven't really gained any weight in the past few weeks, thank the Lord! 

Yes, all of my clothes are maternity clothes, and have been since I've been about 9 weeks pregnant!

He's moving and kicking and rolling around in there.

I'm looking forward to having him when it's cold outside.  I hope it's snowing while I'm in labor, although for our area, that would be a miracle.  I'd like to look at the snow gently cascading from the sky while I labor!

I was craving Mexican food, although I did have some the other day after my doctor's appointment and I also had a Pepsi with it.  About a half hour later, at my midwife's office I started to feel really gross and tired and nauseated, and she checked my blood sugar, which was very high....she gave me a bottle of water to drink and I was fine about an hour or so later, but I felt so sick that I didn't want to eat Mexican food anymore!! That's a miracle.  I still don't really want it.  I'm trying to drink tons of water.  I did drink some pickle juice yesterday!!!

I don't miss anything at all!! 

I'm sleeping alright.  My good sleep ebbs and flows.  The liquid calcium sure helps.

I've got restless legs! 

Yes, I do have stretch marks, but they're hard to see.  My stretch marks are very deep though.  Sometimes I feel like my skin is just going to split open! When that happens, I use this and let me tell you, it helps SO much! It smells so great too!

I'm sure glad I haven't gained any weight in the past month because I'm already heavy and getting around is tough!

The girls made a paper chain a while back to mark the days until Baby Boy's due date, and the chain is looking very short now! I guess there's about 70 more days to go.....

Anyway, I guess that covers this Bumpdate.  Thanks for tuning in!!!!

Tuesday, October 15, 2013

Doctor Day

Today is Doctor Day!!

We have to leave ridiculously early, like in an hour.

I haven't showered yet or even had a bite to eat.

Stay tuned for an update, even though it's a week late!

Thanks for your prayers!

Friday, October 11, 2013


I was reading a blog this morning that I often read.  The blog features a young couple and their baby son, who happened to be born with Spina Bifida.  She has some extremely wise perspectives and she is real and honest and achingly transparent.  Her son, Finn, is absolutely darling and precious.

You can read her blog here.  She doesn't know me from Adam, and I don't think I've ever left a comment on her blog.....I think I ought to, because some of her thoughts and realizations have impacted me greatly.......I've included a couple of her thoughts here, but I've changed them a bit to reflect my thoughts.  She wrote the thoughts but she caused me to also think them, and I've adapted them for my life:

"My circumstances and God's goodness are no longer connected.  He is still sovereign and I am still His child, no matter what is raging or flowing in my life......God is good even if and when He doesn't answer my prayers to MY specifications."

I'm going to be turning these powerful little sentences over and over in my mind and heart today.

Wednesday, October 9, 2013

Scrumpalicious Chocolate Sauce


I can't even remember to regularly post recipes!! I have super-duper tons of recipes, you'd think I'd want to share them!!

Blame it on Pregnancy Brain or Mama Brain, whatever.

But this recipe, this one I had to share because it is just so amazingly fabulous! I was craving chocolate one day recently and didn't have a single crumb of anything chocolate in the house, but I realized I could make my chocolate cupcakes......and then, I needed something that would be a good replacement for frosting, since we didn't have frosting ingredients in the house either......

And this recipe came to me.  I'd never made chocolate sauce, but this recipe just whispered in my ear and lo and behold, when I tasted the finished product, my eyelashes stood up straight and little stars came sparkling out of my eyes!! What's more is that it's super inexpensive to make!

Here it is:

Scrumpalicious Chocolate Sauce

2 sticks real butter
3/4 C baking cocoa
3/4 C brown sugar
2 tsp real vanilla
1/2 C half and half

Melt butter in a small pan over medium heat.  Add cocoa and let come to a gentle boil.  When mixture comes to a gentle boil, add the brown sugar and the vanilla.  Let mixture boil gently for 3 minutes, stirring constantly.  After 3 minutes, stir in half and half and let mixture come back to a very gentle boil.  Turn of burner.  Sauce should be smooth and glossy.  Recipe copyright leeswords2013

That's it! That's all you have to do! I only use the very best ingredients in my recipes.  I'm kind of a stickler on that one thing, because the very best ingredients make a recipe taste the very best.  You can really tell the difference, especially if you have Bionic Taste Buds like I do!! I have to confess, I ate a small bowl of this today.....go ahead and judge, but let me tell you, when you make this sauce, you aren't going to be able to leave it alone!! It's good by itself, and it turns to a ganache texture when put over the top of cakes or cupcakes.  It's also superb over ice cream.

Okay, go make it and tell me how you like it! 

Monday, October 7, 2013

Bumpdate Postponed

Yes, today I'm 7 months pregnant!


But you'll have to wait for an update.  I wanted to wait to do a Bumpdate until after I had gone to my doctor for my regular appointment.  My regular appointment is next week.   I'll be updating after that appointment.

Are you enjoying the beginning of fall?? Or, for a couple of you who read my blog, are you enjoying looking forward to a nice spring/summer??

So, stay tuned for a Bumpdate next week!

Wednesday, October 2, 2013

Please Read

I read a blog called "Tesha's Treasures".

She and I met through our blogs.  We are both BabyLoss Mamas and we really clicked with each other. We email each other and read each other's blogs and pray for each other.  

She has such a transparent heart.  She has such a teachable spirit and such beauty, inside and out.  I cannot wait to meet her in person some day and hug her!!

Please read this post.  She is a great writer, so eloquent yet so simple and so earthy.....she nails a lot of things that are in my heart right now.  It's amazing to me that she seemed to take the thoughts and feelings in my heart right out of me and post them in her post!

Thank you also for praying for her, as she is less than two weeks away from giving birth to her seventh child.

Thank you!!

Tesha's Treasures

Tuesday, October 1, 2013


Today, on this first day of October, I've decided to do a post on products that are not on my favorites list, nor ever will be!

Yes, I have a lot of children and I've been married a long time and have used a lot of products.  This post will focus on the things I've used for myself and have thrown into the garbage after a couple of uses.

So, here we go!

Let's talk about hair products.

This is my first product that I will never, ever use again:

I tried to find a picture of this product so I could post it here, but I went through 12 pages of images with no success! But I want everyone to know that Tresemme Thermal Creations Mousse is not my favorite.  It's lauded to protect your hair after you shampoo when you use heat tools like curling irons or straightening irons.  I got it because it said it also smoothed your hair, and we had been having some really humid days, day after day after day, which is simply atypical for this region of the country.  This mousse is heavy and it made my hair feel dirty by the evening.  I would run my fingers through my hair and they would come away coated with film.  Because of this gross film my hair was lifeless and dull.

You'd think that, since this product is a "salon" product and cost $27 per bottle, that it would be fabulous. Well, I got a sample from Sephora when I recently placed an order with for my birthday with a gift card my friend got me.  I had high hopes and my hopes crashed! YUCK!!
I have no idea why this stuff claims to be so popular! My two oldest girls and I all hated it.  We noticed absolutely no difference in our eyelashes after using this!
I found this stuff, The Body Shop body butter, at my local grocery outlet store.  Now, I don't usually like The Body Shop either, but this was cheap and it had one side of super thick stuff and one side of regular stuff, and I needed something for my dry feet.  I loved the thick stuff and it made my dry skin on my feet disappear, but it made me itch terribly.  It's full of artificial ingredients and so, I have to put it on the Not-So-Favorite list!!
Now, I ordered this with my Sephora gift card for my birthday.  It came in a package of 6 different brands and types of lip stuff.  It is VERY spendy and I hate it.  It is very sticky and very heavy and yet, it wears off within a half hour of applying it! Save your money and don't buy this stuff.
This stuff was given to us, and I had actually used it a few years ago and loved it, but recently they must have changed their recipe because this stuff is worthless! My laundry came out more dingy and not even cleaned.  I won't use this anymore.
This stuff is just all perfume, in my opinion! Never using it again!
This stuff is not very sudsy and you have to use a ton in your dish water to actually get those cleaning suds! So glad to have other choices.

I cannot stand any of these products, for the same reason listed with the Tresemme mousse, but also because of the white flakes that would build up on my hair!! Ewwww!!!!

And I will say, anything Cover Girl totally grosses me out.  It's all cheap and chintzy, and their values and morals, or lack thereof, totally sicken me.

Since this is a post dedicated to my Not-So-Favorite things, it's entirely random. 

I think that's all for today.  I actually look forward to doing an opposite post, listing my favorites!

Stay tuned!


Sunday, September 29, 2013

Please Pray


I really need your prayers.

I am a severe insomniac.

Part of the problem is just being almost 7 months pregnant and super uncomfortable, but part of the problem is that I lack the chemicals in my brain that let me sleep soundly each night.

I refuse to take prescription sleep aids because I believe that a combination of natural supplements are the answer, plus getting to bed at just the right threshold for sleep.

I use several different essential oils and my perinatologist just gave me the okay to use a chewable supplement that I had been taking but didn't think I should take in pregnancy until I could talk to him about it.  He gave me the okay and I'm super glad because it really does help.

Sleep is incredibly important to me.  I desperately need a good night's sleep.  I get probably between 50 to 70 of good sleep a month.  

Living in a sleep deprived state is not fun, for me or my family.  My husband worries about me as I toss and turn and fidget during the night.  Bad things happen to me if I do not get 5 or 6 hours of sleep per night.

So, I'm asking you to lift me up in prayer.

I know that my Father is the soother of my soul.  I know that He has sent the Holy Spirit to calm and comfort me. I know that He can restore and make new and give me those essential and absolutely necessary chemicals in my brain that I need to sleep.  I need His supernatural help in this area.

I know I've asked for a lot in the past few months, but I'm asking for just one more thing: pray for sleep for me.

Thank you and I love you all!!!