I've made a decision.
I've been thinking and pondering the past few days.....actually, if I were totally honest, this decision has always been in the back of my heart, but it's come to the forefront in the past few months, clamoring for attention.
I won't keep my few readers in suspense any longer.
I've decided to go back to being a private citizen.
With private thoughts and a private life.
I have realized how much of a burden and obsession blogging and reading blogs has become for me. I've come to envy those who've never heard of blogging!
I'm actually breathing so much easier now that I've made this decision. I'm feeling so much better now that I've plotted a course of action.
I miss my paper journal. I miss sitting down in the mornings with the Lord and writing to Him in my journal. I miss the feel of the pen and the flow of the words. I'm going to get back to that.
This obsession has gotten so out of control for me that I now bring the laptop out to the living room when I get up, and, after a very short reading and prayer time, I'm on the computer.
I'm so grieved by that! I'm so grieved by the fact that this thing called blogging has taken the place of God in my life.
I can no longer allow that.
I miss having a private life. I know it was my own decision to make my life public by starting a blog, but the fascination is over for me.
I guess you could say I've grown out of this blogging thing.
Over the past several weeks, I've been slipping into an unhealthy state with this computer. I went from not blogging every day, to blogging a couple of times a week, to blogging every day, and now, I'm checking in on my laptop several times a day and constantly thinking about the computer....
I hate that.
I'm putting a stop to it.
I hate the lazy me I've become.
I want to concentrate on being a great wife. I want to remember what it's like to spend lots of time with my kids, having circle time and tea parties and spending one -on-one time with my son. Before they get too old.
Blogging has become a major distraction and a detriment in my life.
So, I'm cutting it out.
The dear friends that I've made online with my blog will know where to find me.
I feel so much lighter since I've made this decision! I feel like vast open spaces await me, to fill with everything productive!
I've decided to permanently delete this blog. I've also decided to no longer read blogs too. That part was a painful decision, but I can't wait to be free again....
I am so looking forward to being old fashioned and behind the times again!
I was so much happier before this blog.
I know it's going to sound funny to you, but I prefer being a private person. I prefer being in silence and solitude to anything, and my heart longs to go back to that, where the only people I share myself with is my family and my husband, and a very few good friends.
That's what I want and that's what I miss.
I don't have much of me, and I've spread myself way too thin, so that I've made the grave mistake of giving my family the leftovers at the end of the day. Gross.
So, this is goodbye. I'll still check my email, but I think I'm going to narrow it down to every couple of days. I will leave this post up for a week, and next Sunday I will delete my blog.
I think I hear my family in the background, cheering and clapping madly!