Friday, May 18, 2012
This man is the reason I have such a blissful life. Seriously. You may want to stop reading right now, because I'm going to brag on my man for a bit here, and it might make you sick, if that type of thing makes you puke.....so stop reading!! Seriously. He has always, from the time he was very young, wanted LOTS of kids, like TWELVE. Man. It's so funny in a weird way that we ended up together, because I never wanted to get married or have any kids at all. Oh, I praise God for bringing me to this man's church when I was a young teen! He knew early on that he wanted to homeschool too, which was something I had never heard of until Russell was at least 5. He has been so patient with me and so forgiving and he has kept his vow to me through nearly 19 years of marriage. I can't believe this is our 19th year of marriage! September. 19 years seems like so long to me. And believe me, it probably has seemed like TOO LONG to him some days!! But he has been as true as the sunrise and as steadfast as the mountains. He's been supportive to me when I needed it and he's lit a fire under me when I needed it. Not to mention that to me, he's the hottest thing going and his kisses still make my tummy feel like I'm on a roller coaster. I still get super excited to see him when he comes home from work every day. I love his unique smell and I love the way he dresses. I love that he wants to honor me and remain pure to me and his family. I love that we come first in his life and everything we do,he wants to do it together! To say I love him with 100% of my being is an understatement. But it would be true!!
These girls have decided that they're best, best friends. Bosom friends. Kindred spirits. They're 2 years apart, and their birthdays are in the same month, 20 days apart. They were destined to be very close. They both speak the same Love Language, which is Physical Touch with a good bit of Quality Time thrown in. They're different, it's true. Sara is very quiet and loves math and reading. Kellie talks all the time and HATES reading. But isn't that the way it goes? Opposites attract. Kellie (the younger one) is so attached to Sara that I fear for the day that Sara gets married!! IF she gets married before Kellie. These two girls have been such a boon to me. I miss them deeply when they're gone and their presence in my home assures me that the sun is going to be shining, even if it's not!
This girl. Oh, This Girl. Be still my heart. This Girl. I'm curiously, deeply, painfully grateful, every SINGLE day for her. I'm so eternally thankful that God allowed her to live. I find myself feeling surprised and totally unworthy whenever I see her face. Yes, I do wish that there was another of her. Yes, I do wish that. BUT I need this girl, for herself, for just who SHE is. And I know she needs me too. Sometimes, when I look at her, deep in her blue eyes, I can see that she knows. She knows I need her. She knows that we need each other. And that makes me indescribably happy. I have come to realize that it is a delicate balance of remembering Olivia and being grateful for Pennie. I found myself swinging over to dwelling on Olivia and what I was missing not having her here, and totally losing sight of PENNIE. So, I'm swinging the other way now, to being grateful and thankful and deeply appreciative for just Pennie. I've also decided to cultivate a thankful heart for the fact that I had TWINS. I was able to have twins. Two babies. In my tummy. And remembering all of the feelings of bliss and excitement and the sense of my feet not touching the ground for days after we found out. Those are the feelings and thoughts I want to remember.
This girl is a firecracker!! And she LOVES it! She simply idolizes Hannah, her oldest sister. This girl is rough-and-tumble. She loves to rough house. But she loves to dress up and play princess and wear some lipstick and have her hair curled. She's the best of both worlds. She's my Life Baby. She's the first baby we had after Janie died. She sort of redeemed my belief in life. She caused a part of my heart to come back to life, in a sense. I've decided to love her extravagantly. I've decided to not waste the time with her. I've decided to let her be herself. To let her be shaped by her oldest sister. She can't do any better than that! I do so enjoy her and love to hold her hand.....when she SLOWS DOWN!!
And one more picture, just to keep it real. Yep, this is me. And my messy house! We were relocating our computer that day, from the "office" in the hallway to the front room. The "office" is getting a make-over to be a more adequate studio for Dave. He's even building his own music station! (I'm proud!) This is me, folks. My daughters love to take pics of me when I least expect it....at random times. Oy. Okay, I'll live with it. I've got nothin' to hide! Obviously. Oh, for some real good makeup!!!!!!
Have a fantastic day!!