I have the best bloggy friends!
You gals really have shown me the body of Christ in action this past week, with your encouraging comments and prayers.
Now it's time to get a new post up on the blog. I hope this one is more hopeful, more optimistic.
What have I been doing this past week?
I have been reading my Bible, even when I don't feel like it and even when I can't quite internalize what I'm reading, or when my attention span is very short (which happens a lot in this season of my life). And slowly, very slowly, Scripture has begun to come back to life for me. My heart has been touched the past few days. My heart has been encouraged, strengthened a wee bit, and convicted too. Praise God He has not alienated Himself from me the way I have alienated myself from Him!
I've been listening to a bit more music too, because I notice it makes me feel better. It puts everything into perspective for me. Music is, after all, my prayer language, being a singer and all. Today I believe that God spoke to me and asked me to concentrate on lifting my voice in song and maybe, just maybe, my heart would be healed and my chains would be broken. It was an "ah-HA!" moment. So, I'm going to try to do more singing this week and next. Baby steps, gals!
I really have stepped up my prayer life again. I could believe the voice that tells me He isn't listening because I've been unfaithful. I could believe the voice that says He doesn't want to hear about what I need or want......only deep down, I know those things just aren't true, because He says "cast all your cares on Him for He cares for you". And "ask, seek, knock". I spent some time this morning interceding for my kids, and it felt really good. Some undefinable thing, deep down, slid back into place in my soul. That's better.
There remains a very, very important thing missing for me, and that is Good Sleep! I take calcium, HTP ( a natural sleep aid, depression and anxiety fighter), and I drink Sleepytime tea, but a lot of nights I don't sleep well, and when I don't sleep well for many nights in a row, ugly things start to happen, trust me! So I need to work on the sleep area.
You know what? I don't know what's going to happen down the road. I don't even know what's going to happen tomorrow. But God does and He's orchestrated everything perfectly just for me. I don't need to know why He does things, only that the Bible says that He does all things well. I am going to find peace in that.