Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Obsessed

The promised post!!

I wish I could take a picture of me right now, you know, the trendy "belly pic".  Alas, picture taking and posting at our house is over, for now.  We take pics and our camera has a memory card that we have to place in our printer to transfer it to the computer and to be able to upload it to a post.  Well, our printer conked out and it no longer recognizes the memory card.  The Musical Mailman has spotted a printer that he is going to get, it's just that we need $200 to get it!! So, pictures of any kind on any posts will not be happening in the near future.

I see blogs where they do week-by-week updates and pics.  I think I'm only going to do monthly pictures.  I think weeklies are overkill.

It's sad that I can't upload pictures, because I do love the shirt I'm wearing today, but I needed to know, from all of you ladies, if this shirt makes me look like a ripe pumpkin??!! Hannah said I looked pretty and that I didn't look like a pumpkin.....but gals, I'm

HUGE!!!!!!

Really, I've never had this big of a belly this early, in ANY of my pregnancies!!

And now, the real topic for this post: my obsession!

I must confess to you all that I have had an obsession with having twins.  For a long time.  It started when I was pregnant with Sofia Elisabeth, 5 years ago.  But it was barely a twinge then.  I had a bit of a twinge when we got pregnant with Lucie.  I was really little with her, though. Hers was the best pregnancy I've ever had! I felt the best I ever have, with her.  With this pregnancy, back when I didn't even know I was pregnant, I had a couple of dreams that we had twins, a boy and a girl.  Everywhere l look, I see twins.  I'm obsessed! I mean it! I can't stop thinking about it.  I have been feeling so yucky and so cruddy and this pregnancy, my symptoms have been magnified, big time!! As previously mentioned, I'm absolutely huge and I think I've already been feeling movements and vibrations! I did have an ultrasound at 7 weeks and there was only one baby there, but gals, I will tell you how obsessed I am!

I went back and studied the 7 week ultrasound pictures, and right next to Baby, there's a shadowy spot, right next to where Baby is.  Yep.  Freakin' out.  I know we're having twins!!!!

With no previous twin pregnancies and no history of twins in our families, I know I'm having twins.  I even took a quiz this morning on the likelihood of us having twins!

The results: our probability of having twins is slim.  18% chance slim.

We have only heard one heartbeat, but that's normal early on, even in multiple pregnancies.

I'm still feeling cruddy, although I have good days.  I have had 5 migraines the last 2 weeks.  I had a migraine just the other day that is kind of hanging around.

I feel a lot of pressure where the Baby is.  I have to go potty at least twice during the night, if not three times.  This hasn't happened before.  I never really have to go potty a lot till the end.

My logical mind knows that I am of advanced maternal age.  I have had 12 pregnancies.  I am 35 lbs overweight (not fun).  My body is totally different with this Baby.  My obsession with twins is just probably a figment of my imagination.

We'd be good twin parents.  We would.  We are ready for twins.  If God chose to do this for us, we'd rejoice!

Truthfully, we have actually been praying for twins, ever since we started trying to get pregnant again.  I've secretly wished and hoped and dreamed.

I have NO idea why I feel that way.  I know multiples are a lot of work and really hard on your body....But we still want them!

Seriously, if you could see my tummy, you'd be asking too! It's really big, and since I carry really, really low, I feel like my enlarged uterus is pushing everything else up and into my rib cage! Ugh.  I'm looking 8 months pregnant and I'm not even 4 months yet!!!

So now you know what I think about when I have too much time on my hands and my mind wanders!!! Crazy, huh?? I think I have a hunch that we are having twins, but it is more than likely wishful thinking and an over-active imagination.

Other things on my mind are: getting an emergency birthing kit put together and set on the back of the toilet.  Since Lucie was born at home, on the toilet (even though we lived only 3 BLOCKS away from the hospital), AND since we now live 40 MINUTES from the hospital, I feel it's imperative that this be done and in place! This will consist of a blanket and towel, shoestring, sharp sterilized scissors, a warm hat, and a gown.  I had this in place on the back of our toilet when Lucie was born, and even told the Musical Mailman that it was there right when she came out, but he was too shocked and a bit panicked to hear! We're talking about all scenarios and all this stuff.  We do have the Boss of our town's EMT's a hop-skip-and-jump away,  and he happens to be a really good friend of our family, plus we are friends with the next town's Fire Chief, which is 20 minutes or less away.  A thought just occurred to me: I have NO idea if our town has an ambulance!!!

This is a real possibility for us, gals.  My labors and actual births are, historically, very short.  As in, hey, you're 6 cm dilated, it'll be 4 hours, oooops! 20 minutes later, no doctor no nurse attending, she's here! And, as in, the nurse goes to check me and I'm 8.5 cm's, she's just getting ready to tell me the baby's still very high up there, when bam......literally a second later, no doctor and three nurses delivering, baby's here! We want to be prepared, because if I go into labor here at the house, it's a very real possibility that I won't make it to the hospital.  We want to be prepared for any and all emergencies and scenarios.  Big stuff around here!!

These are the thoughts that are going through my head these days......twins and emergencies!!

8 comments:

Aim said...

um... maybe go lie down and rest for a bit before your mind starts to smoke. :) you just made me panic a bit to think that I haven't a thing in place yet for this child. oh well. what will be will be. ;) can't wait to hear if you are really having twins!!! and hurry up with that printer so we can see your pics! have to see this belly for my own eyes! ;)

Renata said...

I think it's great you want to be prepared & having one on the toilet would be a scary warning to be ready in case of anything next time!
Looking forward to seeing your beautiful belly pictures - I bet you look adorable!
Can the dr do another scan? My boys were at 9 weeks when we found out there was 2 of them by u/s & it was really obvious at that point - but it depends on the sonographer & quality of the u/s machine too.
Hope you keep well & healthy!
God bless
Renata:)

Duckygirl said...

So....do you have another ultrasound soon that will be able to confirm these suspicions once and for all??? I hope so :) I also wish there was a way you could get pics up, I'd love to see you!

~Laura

Susan said...

I absolutely love oyur posts. Mine are so boring compared to yours. I too think about twins but I know i am not having them. This time.
Maybe you should look into just staying home this time to have the baby, it really is a great experience. You sound like the perfect candidate.
Waiting to hear if there are two.

My Little Warriors said...

Twins would be a blessing indeed! You are such a strong woman to raise up so many wonderful children and to bring even more into the world! I wish I had your ability to have babbies :)
You and your family are in my thoughts constantly! I'll send you an e-mail shortly!

Christine said...

You're so funny, Leanne! BUT, I think about those sorts of things too. I guess you should wait to make sure there aren't 2 in there before you get your emergency kit together. You may need 2 of everything. :)
Love you Leanne!

Devin said...

I'm with Aim--dying to see that belly!!

I'm also with you--praying that, if this is what the Lord would have for you, the desire of your heart would be granted--and that the next time you go to the doc, they would see BOTH of those sweet babes on the screen!

Can't WAIT to hear!!

MarshaMarshaMarsha said...

*deep breath* Leanne!

when is your next u/s? interesting... i know what you mean about being obsessed but i am pretty sure my being obsessed isn't quite as obsessive as your being obsessed! ;)

while i don't even know if God will bless us with another child, there have been such strong moments where i just know that i am going to have a girl. and i have never even desired to have a daughter before. but now the idea doesn't seem so bad, still scary but not bad.

love ya!