We've lived here at this house for almost two years. We moved up here because my parents wanted us to, and they had been asking us to for some time, so we finally did in January of 2009. Dave thought the Farm Life sounded splendid, and we could save so much money by living with my folks.....
Fast forward almost two years.
Basically, we've been kicked out.
So, we're going back to our Hometown House.
We're so relieved. We're so excited. We're so focused.
Let me say that this house has never, and will never, be home to me. I have never felt at home here during holiday visits or day jaunts. Never. Not once.
I wanted so badly to honor my husband by allowing him to move here and realize some of his dreams. But.....
It has been the hardest, most difficult, most horrendous, most dark, most maturing, most growing, most intense years of my life here. I have grown so much closer to the Lord and to my husband and kids.
And I think the agony and pain and horribleness of the past two years have been worth being closer to my Lord and my husband and kids!
I guess this is kind of a disjointed post, a random post, but it's all on my mind right now and I wanted to post it.
We just can't wait to get back to our hometown. We think it's only going to be temporary, but we dearly want what God has for us, whether it's staying in our hometown permanently or moving into the house we have our eye on.
I don't want to go into details about all that's going on here. I strive not to dishonor anyone and I strive to be upright in my mind. I know that where there are many words, sin is not absent. I know that without wood a fire goes out. I know that I'm the one who has to be the Christian in this relationship with my folks.
I can't wait to get back to my very own space. I have a deep desire to be accepted for who I really am. I want to be treated like an intelligent adult. I want to be affirmed and encouraged. I desire peace of mind and a tranquil spirit. I need to be able to take a deep breath, and breathe in serenity. We had that in our hometown.
You may think that it wasn't God's will for us to move here, or that we stepped outside of His will when we moved here.....but we didn't. God brought us here to refine me and shape me and sharpen me. He wanted my kids and husband and me to be closer.
Romans 5:1-5 has been one of the passages that I have been clinging to as a life preserver...."Therefore, having been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through Whom also we have access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and rejoice in hope of the glory of God. And not only that, but we also glory in tribulations, knowing that tribulation produces perseverance, and perseverance, character, and character, hope. Now hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out into our hearts by the Holy Spirit Who was given to us."
Anyway, I just wanted to work out my thoughts in a post, and I'm glad I did. Randomness is my speciality, it's just how my mind works!!
Before I go, here are five more things I'm thankful for today:
My son. I'm thankful for him for so many reasons.
My van. It's luxurious. It runs great. It's cool looking!
My down comforter on my bed. It's all we need, whether it be Summer, Winter, Spring or Fall.
My voice. Specifically, my singing voice. I've been singing since I was 6 years old. Praise and singing is a very powerful tool in many ways, and I'm thankful that my husband is encouraging me to use my voice. I'm going into the studio around the first of the year to make an album.
My dear friends Stephanie. She's everything I need in a friend. She's a sharpener. She's a lover. She's an encourager. She's a prayer warrior. I love her!!
Okay, have a good night!!